I am a girl.
When no one is around I wear hoop shorts and t-shirts. I play in make-up that I would never wear outside. I also dance in the mirror like a world-class choreographer. And sometimes I even cry. Not just on movies either. My feelings get hurt easy. I shut people out. I make jokes about everything because seriousness scares me.
I have issues.
I guess not serious issues. But they’re serious to me. People don’t understand that, and it really grinds my gears. You can’t discount someones feelings even if you think they’re dumb. I hate when people tell me I shouldn’t be upset about something. You aren’t me, so of course you don’t understand.
Everyday I wake up and go to work. I come home and look for other opportunities to advance my career (or get one period). I may even cook a meal (this is me saving money). I balance my checking accounts and make sure all my bills are in order. I go to networking events. I do freelance to keep my skills current (you know how people graduate from college and don’t use their degree..oh). I freelance for FREE sometimes. I’m trying.
I get frustrated.
I can’t count the number of times I just wanted to give up. I know how much of an asset I would be to someone or some company…but they don’t. I am a hard worker…but it doesn’t always pay off (when I want it too). I seem to help people who won’t help me. I can’t express how many times I’ve just been completely lost. No hope. Gotten lazy. What’s the point. But.. quitting is NEVER an option.
I don’t ask for help.
Because I can do it. Well some days I feel like I can do it. I want to be able to do it. I truly feel like whatever I put my mind to, I can get done. No matter the task. I soak up everything. Awesome listener. Awesome put-into-action-er. I’m learning that I can’t do it alone though. Life is not meant be lived alone anyway. Right?
I am thankful.
I have such an awesome support system. My mom and my aunt Jen are my biggest supporters and I’m super thankful for them. I think I would literally be a crazy person on the street if I didn’t have them in my life. My mom helps me with everything. Our bond has grown so much as I’ve gotten older. I can come to her about anything; problems, success, failures, friendships, relationship, etc. My aunt is like a second mother and best friend wrapped into one. She helps me get through the dumb shit. She is there when I just need to talk. We laugh and I love her. My cousin Jess is pretty awesome too. Her life is (what I would consider) perfect. And though she would readily tear the whole “perfect” thing to pieces, she is doing very well. She motivates me. When I feel like giving up, she is someone who helps me and tells me over and over again: I’m great. And if SHE says I’m great, I believe her.
So… I’m a girl. I have issues. I’m trying. I get frustrated. I don’t ask for help. But I am thankful…
3 thoughts on “This is Taylor.”
Its very understable, and it takes someone of strength to put “you” in written form. I admire that, as a man.
Taylor this is beautiful!
I really like reading your blog! I would like to make a blog request if thats alright..you should do a blog on everyday products you use for:
What hair products do you use? Why do you love them?
Do you flat iron, press, relaxer etc?
Whats your favorite hairstyles? How can we do them?
Do you wear make up?
What is your skin regimen?
What facial cleanser do you use?
Describe your style?
top 5 shops you buy clothes at?
Do you online shop? What website