The ‘Good Man’ Syndrome

I would like to start this post off with a small disclaimer: There are good men in the world. I found one.

Moving along.

Good Man Syndrome (GMS) is the condition in which a persons of the male species feels that regardless of their short comings, innate drama filled lives, bullshit goals and aspirations, etc.., that they are in fact, a GOOD MAN. They have no scientific way of proving that they are a good man, they just believe it in their hearts.  Society has allowed them to use material possession, sexual ability (or lack thereof), monetary value, acknowledgment of perceived right and wrong, and perceived social status as an indicator of goodmanship.

I don’t want to get into the definition of a good man, because it’s different for everyone.

I’m sure a few people are wondering what was my inspiration for this post, and although I battled myself for weeks on writing this, I’ve decided to just let it go.

I had a friend that was presumably a good man. After recently learning a few things about him…he is your typical nigga. I won’t even blast him though. Long story short, he may be good; but for someone else. I’m completely sick and tired of men coming to me with this “you’re passing up a good man”, “you don’t know a good man when you see one”, ya da ya da ya da. Listen boys, if you’re a good as you say you are, you wouldn’t be chasing behind me. Food for thought. You would have a just-as-good woman on your side, listening and taking in all the overly emotional bullshit and gossip you spew every waking moment.

Because I am not interested in you, means I have no idea what a good man is? If that helps you sleep at night, then ok. Good men come in a ll shapes and sizes. Colors and creeds. From all walks of life. So, what may be good for one person may not be good for another. What I may love, she may hate. What you may have, I may not want. Of course everyone thinks they are good, or have the ability to be good. My favorite line is “I’m a good dude. I just haven’t found someone worth me being good to.”

I leave you with this: You may very well be a good man. You’re just not MY good man. And if that made you feel some kind of way, good.